When I discovered that I was pregnant with my daughter in late summer of 2006, it came as a shock. I had been told as a teen that I would be unable to conceive. I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, (PCOS) at a young age and my doctor said that my ovaries had suffered damage as a result.

I had never wanted children. I always thought that, at best, I would be the world’s-greatest aunt to my brother’s children. Although my friends thought that I would make a great mom, I always had it in my head that I would be an awful mother—selfish and impatient. I thought it just as well that I would never conceive.

When I became pregnant, my husband James and I were not yet married. My family was very unhappy with the thought of me becoming an unwed mother. My friends were very patient, listening to me dither about my decision, while my family had other ideas. My brother told me outright that I should end my pregnancy, while my parents took the gentler tack of saying that they would support me if terminating the pregnancy was what I wanted to do.

I knew that my faith would make it difficult to end my pregnancy, but I was so scared about the future that I didn't know what else to do.

One weekend James and I took a trip to visit his cousin and his cousin’s wife. They announced that they were expecting; their child’s due-date was very close to ours. I asked James, “If we had an abortion, how we would feel knowing that our baby would have been the same age as their child?”

The appointment for the procedure was scheduled for a couple of days later. This would be our fourth appointment—the other three were cancelled for one reason or another. The night before this final appointment I had a very vivid dream in which I imagined myself having the baby. The dream made me realize that I felt happy and even proud of myself when I talked about having the baby.

The morning of the appointment James told me that we needed to talk, but that it could wait until he picked me up. When I got into the car, I told him about my dream and how I realized that I really did want to have this baby, no matter how scared I was about the future. As I was talking, I knew that he felt the same way, because instead of turning toward the clinic, he turned toward his house. We had both arrived at the same decision in our separate ways: Having the baby was the right decision for us. For me, the moment that we both decided to have our baby was the moment we became husband and wife. We knew that we were embarking upon a rollercoaster ride, but one that we would be taking together.

Having my daughter has been the best decision I ever made, even if it was also the most difficult. She has taught me how to do what is right for me, even if that isn’t necessarily what is right for other people. She has taught me how to ask for help when I need it. She has taught me that I’m a lot stronger than I ever gave myself credit for and, despite my earlier misgivings, that I actually am a great mom.

Laura Jones lives in London with her husband, James, and her daughter, Claire.