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A friend told me
that her dog received an online invitation to a pet
party recently. I couldn’t believe it. What does it mean
that even pets are getting E-vites these days? Then I
mentally listed all the invitations I had received
myself lately. I recalled an E-vite to a birthday party,
an invitation to another birthday party by mail, a lunch
date offer from someone who dropped by my office, and an
invitation to dinner that came by text message.
All these
invitations got me wondering: What does it mean to be
invited? Which invitations do we accept? How do we give
and receive invitations?
When a job offer
took me to a different city far away from friends and
family, I was excited and scared. Would I find new
friends? How would I meet people? Shortly after I
started my new job, a woman at work said, “You should
try this church down the street.” She took a risk by
telling me about a church she thought I would like,
since she didn’t know me very well.
I took her
suggestion and visited the church one Sunday. I wondered
whether the congregation would ignore me. Or would they
pounce and ask me to sign up for every committee they
had? Would I be treated like an outsider or like a
member of the family? As I walked through the door, a
nice older man greeted me with these words: “Welcome to
this place. We’re so glad you're here, and we believe
this place is for all people.”
I immediately
felt at ease. And that was just the beginning. All
through the next week, people from the church showed up
at my door. They brought me a loaf of banana bread. They
invited me to a picnic. They asked if I would help serve
supper at a local shelter. They asked if I would come to
a gathering and offer a prayer.
I thought I had
moved into the Twilight Zone.
Inviting me in
Who were these people, and why were they so genuinely
friendly and interested in me? I appreciated the
greeting, and it really made me feel at ease, but I
couldn’t figure out why they were paying all this
attention to me. I even called my mom to ask her what
she thought about it, and she said, “It sounds like
they're interested in who you are as a person and
they're inviting you to be a part of their community.”
An invitation
into a community . . . why was I so stunned? It never
seemed odd to me to get an E-vite along with dozens of
other people and pets I didn't even know on the guest
list, yet an invitation into community surprised me.
Behind the
banana bread was an invitation to live out who I am and
to explore my gifts. I was invited to participate in an
intergenerational church engaged in the community around
it. This was a place where I was not patronized or
celebrated just for being young — I was called to serve.
It was up to me to act on this invitation. To accept it.
Joining a church
can be hard, even harder than starting a new school, a
new job, or a new relationship. People can be anxious
about becoming part of a church. With real community
comes real responsibility: We hold each other
accountable, whether in service or in prayer.
When the people
at this church said, “this is a place for all people,” I
felt welcome and at home. I believed them, too, because
I saw them live out that assertion. The body of Christ
pulls us into relationship with each other. When we
reach out to one another, we reach out with the hands of
Jesus. And those hands that pull us together also send
us out into the world to invite those who are hungry and
thirsty and lonely and tired.
And those
hungry, thirsty, lonely, tired people may not be looking
for “church.” They're probably looking for community and
for God’s love and acceptance. God is at work in the
real stuff of our daily lives, in our relationships. God
is present in the bread and the wine and in the sanctity
of the waters of our baptism, yes, but God works in the
rest of the world, too. Through us.
The community
that is now my church wondered where I was when I wasn’t
there because they cared about me. I felt honored to be
a part of this place. As a full community member, I
wanted to invite other people into that experience too.
How can we
invite others into our church experience? What makes our
invitation effective? I believe these are key elements:
1. Invite people
to join you.
2. Invite people
to be themselves and to talk about themselves.
When we invite people to join us, we do not invite them
to change who they are. Rather, we invite them to join
us so that we may together encounter God. Invite them to
talk about themselves so you can find out who they
really are. We join each other in community life so that
we can be enriched by the diversity of our experiences
of God.
3. Recognize and
name gifts and challenges.
When we invite people to be a part of our community, we
do so knowing that the diversity of God’s creation is
present in every person. We should recognize their
unique gifts and help lift them up in service to the
world. We should also pay attention to the challenges
people face. Recognize that life happens all the time,
and that when we invite people to be a part of our
community, we are connected as people of God.
4. Listen with
respect.
Embrace people as they are, and listen to what they have
to say. The invitation isn’t about the church. It’s
about encountering God in the life and ministry of a
community.
What if no
one invited me?
The people of that particular church welcomed me warmly.
Would it be easy to find the same experience elsewhere?
What if nobody had spoken to me that first Sunday or
made me feel welcome throughout the following week? How
could I offer my abilities without being asked?
Sometimes, if invitations don’t come, I know that my own
passions and boldness can empower me to to do something
I feel is important in a community. In this way, I model
for the community how we are partners in this
relationship. It can be scary, but I recognize that a
community can grow when it is challenged.
I have once
again moved to another city. Before I moved, my old
church held a sending service. Afterward, we shared some
banana bread at a potluck. They keep me on their e-mail
list and they check in with me now and then. One of my
first priorities in my new city was to look for a
church. I found a community of people who cared for each
other, for their neighborhood, and for God’s world. My
new church sent me an
E-vite to participate in a blessing service for Earth
Day, and we were invited to bring our pets. It’s clearly
a place that cares about all of God’s creation, a place
for all people (and pets). I accepted the invitation.
Kristen Glass is
the director for young adult ministry, ELCA.
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