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The balancing act by Karris Golden 
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Mandy Long, 26, of Raleigh, N.C., knows one speed: fast. “I like to be busy, so my schedule usually doesn’t make me feel overwhelmed,” she explains. “I am able to deal with the stressors of my profession by talking about work-related stress with my fellow nurse anesthetists.”

   
 


It’s Saturday and your afternoon suddenly freed up. Do you
think, “Yeah! Now I have a chance to catch up on (insert household chore here)?” If so, read Karris Golden's suggestions on what else you might do.
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However, Mandy does sometime worry about finding the right person with whom to share her life. "I believe that everyone wants that one special relationship, and when you are single it puts the pressure on to find it," she says. "Also most of my friends are either married or in a serious relationship, so stress builds as I am reminded of what I want but haven't found."

Hers is a high-demand job and can be one of the most stressful in nursing specialties, according to Nurse Week magazine. In addition, Mandy’s family lives 1,000 miles away in central Iowa.

To curb stress and homesickness, Mandy schedules daily time to relax. “I use physical exercise such as running, aerobics, lifting weights, and yoga to help relieve stress. I also get a facial every month as a stress buster. Shopping and dinner with friends helps, too.”

Like Mandy, Kärin also cherishes “me-time,” though she often feels guilty taking the time from her sons. She enjoys running, takes strength classes at her local fitness center, and tries to schedule regular manicures. “That’s a huge pick-me-up after a tough day with a very stubborn four-year-old,” she says.


Where do you fall on your “to-do” list? If you’re like many women, your personal needs don’t often make the top 10.

  Photo by Elizabeth McBride  

Accepting that you can’t control or fix everything brings freedom. It allows you the flexibility to adapt as change comes. It means that when you find yourself with some free time, you won’t fill it up with extra work. When you’ve got a major task to accomplish, flexibility will allow you to accomplish it with aplomb.

Lauren Christensen, 21, wants to build her confidence. As she prepares to graduate from a Midwestern college, the Soldotna, Alaska, native can easily tick off a list of angst-ridden issues.

“I worry I will not be ‘unique’ enough, or (whether) my resume is good enough to get a good paying job,” says Lauren, who is a member of Christ Lutheran Church, Soldotna. “I also worry about being able to advance in my career path.”

Lauren’s worries are common. Sometimes young women feel that they must prove themselves in their profession. And as women mature and establish careers, some add families to the balance.

Victoria Kidd, 34, the mother of a four-year-old daughter and teen-age stepson, works at Susquehanna University in Selinsgrove, Pa. Creating balance is arguably the toughest challenge young working mothers face, she notes.

“We play so many roles in a day that it often becomes impossible to find time for ourselves unless, of course, we get up at 4 o’clock in the morning to have it. That’s something I do on a fairly regular basis.”

Not normally an early riser, Victoria realized the wee hours of the morning are sacred. “I’ve found that the pre-dawn hours are just about the only time I’m going to have any peace and quiet,” she explains. “And, boy, am I blessed for being steered toward that little gem of truth.”

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The truth is, Jesus never asked his disciples to be balanced. In fact, Jesus seems to prefer quite the opposite. Calls such as “Drop your nets and follow me!” and “Take up your cross and follow!” are his norm, and Jesus seems to be irritated by newly called disciples who want to run home first and say goodbye to their families!

When we search the Gospels for guidance on balance, Jesus gives us very little spiritual direction. Indeed, Jesus keeps it confusing! Nowhere is this more apparent than in the story of Jesus, Martha, and Mary.

Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to what he was saying. But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him and asked, 'Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.' But the Lord answered her, 'Martha, Martha, you are worried about many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.'"
Luke 10:38-42

Jesus found in his friend Mary a worthy disciple; her desire to learn and participate in the life of faith could not be taken away from her. What liberation! What a calling! But there is a flipside: Jesus rebukes Martha.

Jesus didn’t say to Martha something like: “Don’t worry, Martha. The tasks can wait. Take a seat and listen, too.” Or, even better: “I understand that many of your tasks are important, so let’s prepare a simple meal, sweep the floor, and then all sit together and talk awhile.” Instead, Jesus just tells Martha that she worries too much and, in effect, tells her she has chosen the worse part.

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