Joy

What brings you joy? Any particular activity? Singing a song, playing an instrument, cooking a meal, walking alone down a prairie path, riding your bike, going fishing, hiking, throwing a party, or drawing a picture? Give yourself the gift of a solid day of doing something purely fun. Feel free to experience a deep joy, without guilt. I don’t know about you, but such undeserved joy reminds me of God’s overwhelming goodness.


 

	Peace

In blending my husband’s and my own family, we’ve found that peace is best built before there’s a problem. Many of his family members are scattered across the Chicagoland area and rarely get together. Mine see each other more regularly, but have difficulty coordinating schedules. So we try to provide and deepen the opportunities for our family and friends to come together. At several dinners, we’ve asked people to share family stories, each offer a prayer, write in a family journal or go on a scavenger hunt for silly things with an assigned partner. Our group recently grew larger when two cousins lost their mother — their center for family gathering. Together we have a growing repository of shared memories to keep us laughing through the years.
 

	Patience

Look behind annoying words or actions to the person God made and loves. Recently, instead of avoiding someone who’d been driving me crazy, I went by and visited him. He still told me the same stories over and over and shared jokes that weren’t funny, but that wasn’t the point. I slowed down, sat, and listened. And listened. I didn’t look impatient, as if I couldn’t wait to finish my errands. (I’m ashamed to think of how many times in the past I’ve not done this.) Instead, I was present, affirming, and accepting without making any demands of my own. He calmed down and I realized again what a great friend he is, one who shows me moments of unexpected grace.


 

	Kindness

When we were kids and short on money, my brothers and I would give our parents envelopes full of crayon-decorated coupons for free housecleaning, laundry, painting, or even backrubs. I’d love a friend to give me a coupon for free babysitting so my husband and I could go out some night, knowing our toddler was in good hands. Consider these possibilities and add your own:

  stamping and addressing Christmas cards for someone with arthritic hands

  mop someone’s floors, or clean the bathroom

  treat a senior for dinner and movie out with you

  Give a do-it-yourself “spa” treatment for a friend who is very busy; who lives alone in a nursing home; or who suffers from Alzheimer’s. Washing someone’s hair gently, cutting their nails, rubbing lotion into cracked skin, applying a facial masque, bathing and moisturizing tired feet — these are small and loving gifts that also give you an opportunity to listen, talk, or just be there.



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