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But things costs more than
money
Enter debt. I think that each debt should contain within
itself the means to repay it, either monetarily or in spirit
and gratitude. When anyone lends us anything, then charges us
more interest than we can afford, it’s usury, and usury
drains the
soul instead of replenishing its account. It also costs
us our confidence that we can meet the next emergency, or
the next debt that we cannot avoid: a medical crisis, a
leaky roof, or a broken-down car. Or that new baby — they cost
money, too.
And with every debt we carry
ourselves, we become more inured to other debts: the
debt of our country, the callous debt of strip-mall
stores that offer "easy" credit at ruinous rates to
the poor and the debt of honor we owe our forefathers and
mothers who escaped from lands where they were unfree.
Instead, we become chained to our wallets and expensive handbags.
Avoid stealing from your
soul
I think that addressing credit card debt requires a
spiritual conversion. Often we get into debt when we’re
afraid — afraid of loneliness, boredom, grief. Once, after a
break-up, I overspent on massages and food to
the point of needing to borrow money to pay the rent. We’re up
against a serious pull — immediate gratification of deep
hurts — in the credit card world. It’s a lot for a soul to
resist. I know that in my brief forays into credit card debt
I felt as though I was jumping off the high dive straight
into anxiety. The bill would come, but I wished it wouldn’t
and somehow I thought that life would protect me, sort of
like Prince Charming.
I think the spiritual life
means
basically being present to each moment. The moment will tell
you what to do. On the other hand, debt won’t. Or, rather it
will, but it will tell you to worry, or spend more, or lie,
cheat, or steal from yourself and your retirement, house, or
vacation stash. You feel enslaved, which is a terrible
thing for an independent woman to feel. Debt intrudes on our
lives and steals something far greater than pennies a
day. It steals a bit of your soul and the sacred space
that allows us to be self-sufficient, with the Lord, the
saints, and all of God’s bounty.
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